Hello! This blog post is a shorter, more informal version of the reflective essay we had to submit a few weeks ago.
My second year as a
Game Art Design student at De Montfort University has been a journey of
personal growth and self-acceptance of my own weaknesses and strengths. It has
been a period of change and transformation, a time for experimentation but,
above all, it has been a stage for important decisions to be made.
Working
in a team has been a positive and rewarding experience. Every group project I have
worked on this year involved a process of adaptation. From time to time I disagreed with the group and in some
cases one would attempt to enforce an idea, resulting in an uncomfortable situation. To begin with, I found it difficult to
convey my ideas and thoughts and I felt invisible to the rest of my team
members. This could be attributed to a lack of confidence
in my own skills, as I am an introverted person.
As I
progressed through the year, I gradually came to realise that my ideas were at
least worth consideration and that certain projects could have been different
with my input; I wanted to be heard. It was not until the Container City project
that I broke through the shell and began to have a bigger impact on group work.
Being
part of a team has given me a sense of responsibility and tolerance. Working
together meant we were able to share the workload, thus achieving a higher
productivity rate within the time limit. As artists we
work in diverse manners, with different speed and it is only when we move in
accordance to our colleagues that we progress. I have experienced both sides of
the spectrum this year, for example working in fast-paced dynamic teams would
occasionally result in falling behind on my work, which made it seem like I was
slowing our productivity. I discovered the complexity of adapting to a pace one
is not comfortable working at and I learned that rather than riddling myself
with guilt I should strive to contribute faster every time. On the other side
of the matter, working within a team with a lower productivity rate can often become
frustrating. If I would try to push each one to produce work faster then it would only decrease
performance. Therefore, the only available action was to be patient and
encourage them to work harder via positive reinforcement. In theory this
may have been the correct method, but it also proved to be tasking in terms of
meeting a deadline.
Also,
this year has been demanding in terms of technical skills required and I have
been under constant pressure to achieve the expected high level of commitment
to the course. From day one I was asked to produce vast amounts
of work over small time periods. I also switched from working in traditional
media to digital media (with exception to life drawing) almost instantaneously,
which I found overwhelming. Furthermore I had to change diffuse and specular maps methods for PBR texturing. It was difficult to adopt
this complex method and I struggled trying find the logic behind it, causing
much frustration. As the year progressed I
began to understand the concept of PBR texturing in depth and it resulted in
lower stress levels, whilst instilling a boost of confidence to my skills as a
game artist.
On the Visual Design side of
the course I went out of my comfort zone by using new methods of creative
designing such as silhouette design and photobashing.
The biggest challenge I have faced this year has been
presented in the Off the Map competition, sponsored by GameCity and the British
Library which we just finished. In such an ambitious project
I set high expectations for myself, thus I decided to create a fully animated
rabbit that would run through the level. Our course
promotes independent learning and as one progresses into third year the amount
of taught lessons decreases, meaning for this animation task I was to work
alone. I sought help from books and video tutorials and
gradually the pieces of the project began falling into place. As the project continued, I became familiar
with independent problem solving and, because of this, partially losing contact
with teaching staff was not a huge concern. I now realise that upon entering
the workplace, in this case the gaming industry, constant work supervision will
not be provided so I also appreciate this process of detachment that my
university tutors encourage. Furthermore, this has given me a greater
analytical way of thinking when perceiving feedback, as I have learned to decipher
key information to react, implement and change. After a trial-and-error
animation process and several challenges I came across when implementing the
character into the game engine, my group currently has an AI-controlled rabbit
guiding the player through the level. The appreciation I have received is the
most rewarding feeling I have had of yet and feeds my appetite for producing
more successful pieces of game art.
During
the course of every project, I have had to present them in front of a small
audience, mainly composed of the Critical Studies team and peers, with focus on
testing my “soft skills”. I
approve of this method, because I believe that in order to succeed one must be
able to present themselves properly, to communicate well and to convey their
ideas in a non-imposing manner. Positively reacting to feedback is also
important, so through publically exposing myself to constructive criticism is a
great way to improve and build confidence. I still feel nervous when talking in
front of an audience, especially if it is a topic I am unfamiliar with, but I
have learned a certain degree of improvisation and also to stay positive throughout
presenting.
I can see now that not
only have I refined both technical and soft skills, but also my personality and future vision have both been enhanced for
the better. At the beginning of the year I was adamant that I wanted to become
a concept artist, because I have always been enthusiastic about expressing my
creativity through drawing and painting. However, as time progressed and I
became more proficient using 3D tools I started second guessing my career
vision as I questioned whether concept art was the path that I desired to take.
As a result, I sought clarification by choosing to experiment with as many
aspects of game art as I could. At this point in time, I have sculpted figures via
3D software, completed VFX work, animated characters and completed forms of coding
via blueprints in Unreal Engine 4. After having a feel for all those different
aspects of creating games I thought I would be able to establish a preferred
area to work in, but the truth is that I still cannot choose one and this worries
me. Not being able to see a goal in my future career is proving a daunting
thought. I feel that my third year
focus should be to improve all range of skills previously stated in order to provide
an excellent understanding of many aspects that will make deciding job aspirations
easier.
If I had
to pick my ideal job then it would likely involve working as a freelancing concept
artist. My main reason is the freedom given to work from anywhere in the world
and the enjoyment of working in many different projects and clients instead of
being bound by the restrictions of being part of a company. However, I have
been considering other options due to the realisation that it would take me
many years to develop the skills needed to become successful. I feel may be so focused on my weaknesses that I tend to
disregard my strengths. I think I need to analyse my personal findings and
reflect upon them to choose the best course of action.
I am uncertain
of what career lies ahead so I will learn as much as I can on various aspects
to end up with a broad range of skills that would improve my employability. My
plan of action for the next few months is to train my fundamental skills such
as life drawing, perspective drawing and rendering techniques. I also want to
revise my character work, produce better models by improving silhouettes and
topology as well as learn new techniques to be able to work more efficiently. I wish to improve my texturing skills for stylised and realistic
characters, as well as improving mesh deformation in the case of applying animations. Last but not least I'd like to learn more about Unreal Engine 4 to create
better looking games. I also need to brainstorm ideas for my FMP (Final Major Project), considering
it is the pinnacle of all the knowledge I have gathered during my three years
as a game art student.
To
conclude, this academic year has broadened and refined my technical knowledge,
from sketching the human body to placing playable characters into a game. It
has taught me about the value of team work within the video games industry and
by losing the fear to speak my mind I have been rewarded with the necessary tools
to be able to communicate properly and to work in a sociable environment. This experience
has also promoted my independent learning as well as increasing my adaptability
and tolerance to work with different people. It has also fomented the
importance of good organisational and planning skills and opened my mind to new
career paths that has made me question my future aspirations.
I know it's still long but this has been my second year at DMU. Thank you for reading and see you soon!
